A policeman pulled a car over and told the driver that because he had been wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000s in the state-wide safety competition.
"What are you going to do with the money?" asked the Policeman.
"Well, I guess I'm going to buy a driver's license, and maybe some insurance too" he answered.
"Oh, don't listen to him," yelled a woman in the passenger seat. "He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."
This woke up the guy in the back-seat, who took one look at the cop and moaned, "I knew we wouldn't get far in a stolen car."
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"